Swim

I swim.
Not because I'm some kind of dieter/exerciser.  Seems the more I exercise the less I diet.  I'm not one of those golldarn health illusioners.  My wonderful wife is but not me.  Not at heart anyway.  Of course, being very married, I do follow her path to keep her happy and to keep up that personna that I think she has of me, but I swim because I'm old and I hurt. 
One day years ago Ms Donna said, more than once, "Don't move that chicken coop without me".  So I did.  Been hurting ever since.  The MRI guys said that I screwed 2 discs.  So I went to therapy and I learned to stretch and I learned how to take drugs (well I already had experience with that, being an American youth and all) and I learned that I had to do more.  They suggested I swim so there I went.  I go 3 times a week and been doing it for years.  I love it.  Makes me feel relaxed and energetic both at the same time.  When my back gets too old for me I'll go to the YMCA and do a quick 20 laps and I'm set for the rest of the day.  No pain.  Or usually no pain.  At least less pain. 
When I have skipped swimming I walk like Gunsmoke's Chester.  The pain even wakes me up at night.  So I suppose I'm' addicted to swimming for the rest of my Y member days.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            '
OK, so I read an article today.  It was about swimming.  Swimming in the public pool.  'They' (there's that They again).  They did a survey.  They asked people who go to public pools if they go while they're in those pools.  7 out of 10 said yes.  Yes.  Yes they piss in the very water they're immersed in.  OH MY GAWD.  7 out of 10 admitted that they pee in the pool.  How many who do pee in the pool didn't admit it?  Another 2 out of 10?  OH MY GAWD.  At least I know that 10 out of 10 do not pee in the pool because one of those 10 is me.  And no, I do not pee in the pool.  Gyeeuukk. 
'They' went on to say that most people don't shower before they get into the pool.  Remember we live in America.  We're not French.  We don't cleanse our butts, we wipe them.  We wipe them with a piece of paper.  So we're walking around all day with unclean butts and with layers of dead skin and dust and smog and whatever, all on our bodies.  And we go into the pool without showering.  OH MY GAWD.
Like I said, I go to the Y.  They like to help the neighborhood.  They like to help children.  It's summertime and the Y is helping a lot of young kidlings learn how to swim.  They bus these tykes in to get into the pool.  Hopefully they teach the little ones to shower.  But who's keeping them from pissing in the pool?
My pool is clearly unclear.  If there's 20 children in the pool when I get there then 14 of them are pissing.  How many just used the can without washing?  I watch them now.  If I see a kid stop and do nothing up against the pool's edge I point at them and yell, "Stop it.  Stop what you're doing right now.  Stop pissing me off'.  Somebody's gotta do it.
I used to think it was OK really, since they shock the pool often with chlorine.  But this study was good enough to point out that chlorine is diluted (weakened) by urine.  So not only is there tons and tons of urine in your pool but the cleaners that they use to clean it don't even clean the urine that you're in.
Swimming in the swamp.  No, it's actually worse than the swamp.  Even if frogs and fishes do piss in the stream, they don't dump as much as the average human kid.  I can't believe that I've been swimming 3 days a week for years and years in a cesspool.  I've been swimming in the toilet. 
Not only will I take a good shower before swimming but now, from now on, I'll be taking a thorough shower after I get out of the pool too.  And I'll scrub and scrub and scrub and scrub.